Milestones

The author and theologian C.S. Lewis once wrote, "The safest road to Hell is the gradual one ­ the gentle slope, soft underfoot, without sudden turnings, without milestones, without signposts."

In this land of sand, where the slope is always gentle and soft underfoot, where there are no stones, let alone milestones, perhaps I should explain.

In the old days in England and, perhaps, much of Northern Europe, there used to be markers on roads. They were huge stones ­ rocks, really. A mason would carve onto the face the number of miles one must travel to the next courthouse. A milestone, therefore, was a marker telling you how much farther you had to go before you got to where you were going.

In this sense a milestone points to the future, indicating how much longer you have to travel to your destination.

Today, the term "milestone" is used in business planning. A project will have several milestones, points in the project which must be reported to management and which must be completed by some specific time. The construction project going on just to the southwest of us might have one milestone called site preparation, another called laying cement block, a third called roofing, and so forth. A milestone, in this sense, is still pointing toward a future destination ­ in this sense in time, rather than in space.

When I was researching ways in which people use the word "milestone" today, I came across this startling example: two people talking about what milestone to use to determine whether the termination of a pregnancy is legal abortion or murder. Time? As in anytime during the first trimester is ok, but afterwards is not ok. Fetal development? As in anytime before brain wave activity is ok, but not afterwards. Or anytime before drawing breath, but not afterwards. Circumstance? In the case of rape, incest, or when the mother's life is in danger, termination of the pregnancy is ok, otherwise it is not. These milestones are clearly important and are intended to offer guidance to those seeking significant moral decisions. A pregnancy counselor is guided by legal milestones established since the Roe vs.Wade decision, as well as personal milestones learned through education, culture, and religion.

There's another way in which we use the word milestone, however. That's to describe significant events or transitions in our lives which we can see looking back. I think of my own life this last year. I could have predicted some of the momentous moments, but not all of them. There was the move to Florida, about which you've probably heard too much. The death of our miniature poodle, Bernie. The birth of our granddaughter, Lily. My becoming your New Congregation Minister and Pat's becoming a student at Embry Riddle. Finally, our recent move to an apartment closer to the church and the school. A few of these major changes in our lives could not have been predicted on January 1, 1998.

Again, my research gave a really great example of a personal milestone the author was celebrating when he wrote: "One month, one week, three days, 16 minutes and 51 seconds. 800 cigarettes not smoked, saving $110.03. Life saved: 2 days, 18 hours, 40 minutes."

A lot of us make New Year's resolutions this time of the year to do something different in our lives ­ quit smoking, take up a healthy habit, lose weight, etcetera. We usually intend to start on January 1. Indeed, some of us do start on January 1. And by February 1 most of us have quit whatever new habit we intended. Often stopping a habit or beginning a new one doesn't happen according to resolutions or intent. As they say in 12-step programs, it happens in God's time, not our own.

I used to smoke ­ three packs a day. Then one fall when I was about 39 years old I was invited by a friend to join a women's soccer team. Everyone on the team was 30 years of age or older ­ I was one of the oldest. I turned out for practice and was told to run around the track. Run! Around the track! More than once! I started out. After about one furlong my heart was pounding, my face was red, and I was out of breath. My friend Molly, who'd already run around the track once, came up alongside me. She spoke to me as we jogged along, "I always quit smoking during soccer season. You want to quit with me?" I didn't have the breath even to say anything, so I nodded my head affirmatively. And that's how I quit. I didn't know on January 1 of that year I was going to quit. I knew I wanted to quit. I knew I'd quit twice before and twice before started up again. I didn't know that I was going to quit forever that day ­ without any preparation, without a patch, cold turkey.

Out of curiosity how many former smokers are there in the room? How many of you quit as the result of a New Year's resolution?

[DRAW CONCLUSION.]

So now you have an idea of what a milestone is. I invite you now to share with the congregation one significant milestone which occurred in your life during 1998 ­ either one you intended or one that happened in God's time.

[INDIVIDUAL SHARING]

This morning, during "Words for All Ages" I told a flood story . It is a Caddo myth, coming from the first nation peoples who lived in Oklahoma, the Red River area of Arkansas and northern Texas. In Greek mythology, after a great flood, stones (representing the bones of Mother Earth) become the skeletons of the new human race. In many spiritual traditions floods symbolize destruction and stones represent durable new beginnings.

We have spoken this morning of some of the personal milestones ­ the durable new beginnings -- in the life of this community ­ the permanent markers we can see and name and count on as we move forward as individuals and as an emerging community. It is good to know that we have these durable qualities within, between, and among us. By these markers we leave our mark ­ as persons and as a community committed to reaching out to those who seek a spiritual home, nurturing one another and to affirming the values we hold most dear in the wider community.

In closing, let me call to your attention the "New Year Dream Chart" in your order of service. It was created by LuisahTeish, the internationally acclaimed teacher of African spirituality. She suggests that the chart help you clarify your intentions for the new year and provide a timetable. If, after you fill it in, you post it somewhere where you see it often, it can serve as a gentle reminder. She adds a caution. The sample chart is a way, not the way. Design one that suits your lifestyle. I would add, the important thing is to be aware of your intentions and that they don't all have to start this week. Finally, on December 31, 1999, as we enter the new millennium, you might note on your chart milestones which occurred in your life which you didn't intend, which happened in "God's time", not yours.